I had predetermined how the conversation was going to go, and I didn’t do a good job of listening or asking questions.

It’s happened a few times during the busyness of the last couple weeks. I’m not proud of it, and when it happens in small talk it’s not polite but the bigger issue is when it happens in bigger conversations. Over the weekend I caused unnecessary tension and an argument because I didn’t do a good job of listening or asking clarifying questions. I know better. I know how to communicate effectively and even I need a reminder and re-set in doing it.

Small talk is a great place to practice. It doesn’t require a large expenditure of time and training yourself to be a better listener can save you time in the future.

Use these topics to practice in small talk this week.  

"What was he thinking?"

"How could the team be so bad?"

"What the heck happened in that game?"

Every sports fan asks questions like these. It's part of being a fan and debating decisions is one way to talk about a game, but not every one wants to dialogue and discuss what happened. Sometimes fans want to vent about a call they hated or a disappointing outcome.

Venting is different than dialogue. There's a place for both, but it's helpful if you share that objective at the beginning of the conversation.

As a sports broadcaster who's in the clubhouse and talking to coaches and managers about the decisions that get made, I can offer insight and have a conversation about why things happened in a game. But that's not helpful if I'm talking to someone who just wants to vent. Telling me at the outset of the exchange saves time and prevents a lot of frustration. In fact, being clear on your objective in a conversations you have with friends, family and...

Drama comes in many forms and sports has just about every kind you can think of. Unpredictable finishes, unlikely outcomes, tension between teammates, and even personal drama that makes it into the tabloids.

It's why fans talk about sports as being the best reality show on TV. I happen to agree.

If you're not interested in talking about the game itself you can talk about the drama around the team. It all counts as sports talk and it's just another way to connect with the people you encounter every week. Here are a few topics that work this week. 

We are a quarter of the way through the NFL season. If you’re not already a fan, now is a great time to get on board.  What’s in it for you?  Multiple relationship building opportunities in business.

1. Everyone is doing it. (just about.) I know your mom told you it wasn’t a valid defense, but the NFL could be the exception. Just consider that 75 of the top 100 watched programs in 2021 were NFL games. Surveys show that about half of all Americans say they’re NFL fans. That translates to about 164 million NFL fans in the U.S.
2. Strength in Numbers. With that many fans it’s not just about becoming part of the cool club, it’s about all the relationships you can cultivate as a result of being a fan.  Being a fan gives you common ground and easy access to all the other football fans in the U.S. Who do you want to do business with?
3. Headline Generator. Whether you become a fan or not, the NFL season will dominate headlines from now...

After watching the Seattle Mariners clinch a playoff spot for the first time in 21 years, I was reminded of how much sports means to fans. Sure they celebrate wins, but they're also creating memories that span generations.

Don't overlook the value of a little bit of sports talk this week or what these conversation starters can do for you. 

Following results of every single game can be time consuming… and depending on the team you follow – tedious.

If you’re not the type of person who enjoys tracking daily or weekly results, you might appreciate lifetime achievements. Heck, who couldn’t appreciate career accomplishments that reflect a lifetime of hard work?

This is another example of how sports conversations can springboard to other business topics. You can use popular sports topic to start a conversation and then transition to something else, like the accomplishment you’re most proud of in Q3. (And if you think you shouldn’t, can’t or won’t talk about your personal accomplishments… keep an eye out for a blog on that this week.)

There are a couple career accomplishments in this week’s list of conversation starters plus a few other topics to talk about this week.

In traditional business settings there’s performance review “seasons.” In sports, every game during a season offers its own performance review. Certainly fans weigh in on individual performances (usually by cheering, booing or their reactions on Twitter) but here’s what is more relevant to our conversation - coaches and players are forced to evaluate effectiveness each and every game.

Athletes can’t avoid what shows up in the stats. Coaches can’t ignore the effectiveness (or ineffectiveness) of plays that were called.

When coaches and players evaluate games and outcomes its usually based in facts, like stats and outcomes. Seattle Seahawks defensive coordinator Clint Hurtt lays it out in this Learn From A Leader video. 

It’s a model that works for all types of performance reviews. Deal in facts. Know your numbers. Don’t just say, “I improved from last year” provide specifics like “I increased by sales by...

Busy, hectic, full... if all of these words could be used to describe your schedule these days, I get it.

I also understand that its easy to skip the small talk and just get down to work. Some days it's the best way to stay on track, but it's also worth remembering that you can have a complete conversation in less than a minute.

These sports conversation starters can help with short exchanges this week. 

The NFL regular season is underway and if you need a default conversation topic from now until the Super Bowl on February 12, football is a safe bet. Just consider the TV ratings from last season. NFL games accounted for 75 of the top 100 most watched TV programs in 2021 and the Top 5 most-watched programs were NFL games.

Millions of fans tune in for weekly games. They might not like every outcome, but they generally enjoy talking (or venting) about what happened.

The popularity of the NFL and football in general is why it’s most-often at the top of our weekly Conversation Starters list. You don’t have to go far to find a good talking point but there’s plenty of other options this week too.

A few weeks ago I suggested using NFL training camps to start conversations so you could circle back around with those football fans at the beginning of the regular season. This week marks the beginning of the NFL regular season. Now is great opportunity to circle back around and ask questions like these.

• How are you feeling about your team after watching them in the preseason?
• How many wins are you predicting for your team?
• Who do have winning the Super Bowl?

There’s more than just football to talk about, take a look at these topics making news this week.